Everyone Please Calm Down And Grow A Plant

If I ask nicely, would everyone who doesn’t have a houseplant please get one? I’m not a political person. I’m happy and contented just minding my plants. But even an introvert like me is aware of the tight-as-a-fiddle-string tension popping up all over, politically and otherwise.

Ever notice how uptight some politicians are? Their lack of smiles and frequent scowls indicate they don’t garden enough. In fact, I don’t allow our houseplants access to the daily news or social media anymore. I’m concerned even the jade plant might become jaded. A very wise horticulturist once taught me that plants are far more reasonable than most people.

Maybe we should put the world on a time-out in the corner and not release anyone until they promise to grow a plant because countless studies demonstrate plants’ calming effects on us humans.

Tending plants, both indoors and out, has been shown to reduce blood pressure, calm stress, improve feelings of self-worth and promote a positive life outlook. Gardening programs in prisons reduce inmate hostility and fights. School children who participate in horticultural activities become more accepting of students different than themselves and increase their own self-image. Hospital patients with views of well-landscaped courtyards require less pain medication and complain less to nursing staff.

Angry people with pent-up frustration probably aren’t going to rush to the nearest plant store anytime soon. Maybe we can help by gifting them with something to grow. Does anyone have Donald Trump’s delivery address?